Refreshing one

Doctor to his lady patient: You look terribly weak and exhausted! Are you having your meals three times a day as I have advised?
Lady: What?!? I thought you said three males a day!

Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Hubby: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
Wife: See how powerful I am for you?
Hubby: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, 'What other problem can there actually be that's greater than this one?'

Son: Mum, when I was on the bus with dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.
Mum: Well, you have done the right thing.
Son: But, mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap.

Father to son after exam: I want to know how you are getting on at school. Let me see your report card.
Son: My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents.

cya